Girl Bloggers and Boy Bloggers

Posted on December 2, 2011 by

Right now, everyone in social media is doing content marketing. They’re either getting paid well for it or they’re struggling to find work and keep getting fired because they overpromised the returns companies would see from social. I fall into the former category, but I still consider myself a struggling author/content marketer/SocMed Guru because I’m doing the cobbler’s kids routine. I don’t write enough on my own sites to keep people coming back – some people say you need to do something daily and do it well every day to get people to notice…like what the sun does over the water each evening.

Maybe you’ve done it too. You write some magnificent posts that get people thinking. You get some comments rolling and think you’ve got it made. Then you wander away for a few minutes and suddenly months have gone by and the blog is stagnating.

Happens to everyone. But the approach upon return is dictated by your gender. Seriously. Think about men and women and how we cultivate and maintain our friendships. We’re drastically different and I posit we’re the same way online. To wit…

Women agonize over seeing old friends again. They bear the weight of the world on their soul when trying to figure out the right things to say and the right way to break into conversation with friends from ages ago. Maybe these women have shared secrets and fears and more…but separate them for a while and it’s like recreating the relationship.

Men are not that complex. Separate us for four minutes or for four score and you get the same result. “Hey dickface, your Astros still blow. How’s work? Want a beer?” That’s it. If men are real lucky, they’ll get a man hug and maybe some chicken wings…but the angst isn’t there when guys reconnect.

That brings me to my point about blogging hiatuses. When a woman abandons her blog for a bit, she apologizes like a repentant mass murderer when she returns. A guy just jumps back in and says, “here’s what’s going on, enjoy!”

So, read the above one more time so you didn’t miss any nuance or sarcasm and then hear me clearly, “Here’s what’s going on, enjoy!”

Column, Main, social media

blogging, content marketing, men, relationships, social media, women, writing

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4 Responses to Girl Bloggers and Boy Bloggers

Meg says:

December 2, 2011 at 12:28 pm

I used to be a little more fraught when I’d disappear from blogging for long periods of time — mostly because for years I was posting 5 or 6 times a week, and avidly reading and commenting on other blogs, and people would actually leave comments asking when I’d post again. Even now, when I pop up with a post, they go, “oh, yay, I was hoping you were okay.” I don’t think my writing is remotely that interesting or addictive on a blog level, but there it was. So I felt apologetic.

Then, of course, I started spending all my free time talking to some guy in Boston and the blog bit the dust pretty hard. My dad would ask all the time when I would write again, but I just didn’t. Then I moved here and extended my work hours and commute, and just like that, became even more scarce.

Now I just write when I can, or when I feel like I have something to say, but I don’t apologize for long gaps of time unless I’m self-reflexively mocking myself for thinking anyone really cared that much. Because no one does. Except my dad.

That said, I know many men who are neurotic about both their blogging and their friendships — not everyone exists in the back-slapping beer model.

(On a different note, I’m glad I’m just a writer. For whatever needs writing. It’s so much easier to transition between jobs if I’m not placing my value within a particular field or particular technology. I think the people who shape their careers in the Swiss Army knife model do better than specialists — which sounds counter-intuitive, but…)
Jeff Cutler says:

December 2, 2011 at 12:59 pm

I’m just plain neurotic. And I like the Swiss Army knife model, but I often wonder if I would be at a different stage in my career if I had focused on one area. For example, if I went into the armed services, I’d be done by now and retired. Or if I had been at one job since college, almost the same boat and likely a nice package and retirement watch.

That said, I wouldn’t trade the freedom (intellectual and physical) that comes from my career choice. I could be doing this in Paris or Belize or Boston…and the travels I’m able to take into other people’s minds are fulfilling too.

Jeff
Julio Fernandez says:

December 2, 2011 at 2:10 pm

Hey Jeff, here’s what’s going on with me: complaining about Klout and missed marketing opportunities. Let’s have a beer. https://plus.google.com/u/0/106914186897370535526/posts/AMPV1dbSMSr
Neal Schaffer says:

December 3, 2011 at 3:08 pm

Hey Jeff,

Appreciate your linking to my blog vis a vis social media ROI. The funny thing is that I blogged about this very same issue a few months ago:

http://windmillnetworking.com/2011/06/01/why-your-business-blogging/

In that post I said,

“I cannot promise you that I will blog x times per week going forward, as the publication of organic ideas should not be governed by an editorial calendar. I will promise you, however, that when I do blog, it will be for real.”

Is that a guy thang?
Neal Schaffer´s last [type] ..Nonprofits and Social Media: Putting the Appeal Back in Annual Campaigns

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