Paranoia

A Snaking Suspicion

August 26, 2007

No Comments



That when you find yourself foraging for your golf ball in the thick underbrush, a snake will mistake your ankle for a tasty rodent and attach its fangs to your leg just above the Achilles so you topple sideways into poison ivy, poison oak and a deceptive puddle of quicksand.
read more

Meaty Err

August 13, 2007

No Comments



That while reclined in a plastic patio chair watching the Perseid Meteor showers at 1AM, a coyote will wander up the back stairs to your deck and bite you in the head.
read more

Clipped In-cident

July 5, 2007

1 Comment



That while riding along on your bike behind a parade, the parade participants will stop suddenly (as parades are wont to do) and you will slam on your bike’s brakes successfully bringing your cycle to complete stop — but in that millisecond that you remain upright, you will realize that […]
read more

Air Critter-ditioner

July 2, 2007

No Comments



That the air conditioner that you left in the basement or on the porch all winter is now home to funnel-web spiders and brown recluse spiders and all manner of killing insects and that the device will spray these critters all over you while you rest in your cool bedroom […]
read more

Code for Technorati

June 29, 2007

No Comments



Technorati Profile
read more

Toilet Treachery

June 29, 2007

No Comments



That your legs will fall asleep so badly on the toilet that you’ll try to stand up and fail miserably, tumbling either headlong into the granite sink and dying from a head wound or flipping majestically into the tub and drowning from the constantly dripping faucet.
read more