It’s a Crock…Pot

May 3, 2011

Whilst napping peacefully on the couch, you hear a slight clank. A sound like metal on glass. Similar to the cats’ tag banging against the food dish – but different and more sinister. The sound continues at regular intervals, just frequently enough to bother you, yet not so often that you are compelled to get up and investigate.

After 11 tortuous minutes of this noise, your brain starts to fill in the unknown. You imagine a rat is hidden in amongst the clean dishes and will bite off your hand when you open the cabinet. Then you think it’s probably a snake that has come from the sewers of New York City – because that’s what they do. And finally, you think it’s a person who was buried in the walls of your house ten or more years ago. This person has finally snapped out of their suspended animation and is knocking on the wall with their hook hand in a quest to get out and find the evil people who imprisoned them.

Alas, the movie producers and dark-novel writers like Steven King have triumphed again as you get up and find out the sound is just something bubbling quietly – mostly – in the crock pot on the counter.