MONSTERS

February 2, 2008

They say that if you feed a gator you’ve created a monster and that’s not fair to the gator or to the world.

I did my best, and succeeded, in NOT feeding these two gators. Gator 1 was on the second hole at Beachview. I drove the green on this 280+ yard hole. The gator didn’t care and was waiting to snack on my calf or forearm or any small animal. For times like this I like to keep a bag of punting dogs on the golf cart. You  know the ones. They’re the tiny dogs that people think it’s OK to bring on planes.

The second gator was larger than the first and was on the eighth hole. I didn’t have my ball land anywhere near him but decided to go visit and see how friendly he was. He wasn’t. In a flash he splashed into the intracoastal waterway and disappeared from sight. THEN, he slowly reappeared at the surface and stared at me. I got a tiny bit closer and the water began to churn and he vanished again.

Worried that he may have either gone for help or was building up speed to launch himself from the water, I put the golf cart in reverse and backed away quickly.

Were I dumb enough to lie down next to him with my arms above my head, this gator would have eclipsed me. I’m about six feet tall and my arms are about 20 inches long from elbow to fingers. SO, this gator was probably about 10 feet long. That’s plenty long and scary. BEWARE.

Oh, I figured out where all the groundhogs went today. The gators ate them.

More to come…