Mole Sauce

July 2, 2011

That when your cat comes home from a tough day at the office – errr field – she will bring with her a plump, yet dead mole. You won’t notice this mole in the cat’s mouth as she proudly trots into the house and deposits the dead creature in the middle of the floor.

Your efforts to save energy have resulted in keeping the house quite dark, so you don’t see the mole at all during the day and it’s only when you get up in the middle of the night to pee that your path takes you squarely over the mole. You barely brush it on the path to the bathroom, so nothing happens. But then…as you exit the bathroom and wend your way back to bed you stomp directly on the squishy rodent. You yelp loudly, lose your balance and tumble headlong into a poorly constructed IKEA bookcase (that’s another worry), which then topples over and pins you – with your head next to the mole body – under scads of social media books and nametags from various conferences and Tweetups.

Finally, the cat hears you screaming and comes over to you and bites your face because she was trying to sleep.