If a dog craps on your driveway….

December 24, 2008



CF and I have about had it with neighbors who allow their dogs to go the bathroom on our driveway. It’s bad enough that people allow their pets to crap on lawns and on trails in the woods (hiking trails mind you!), but letting your dog dump one right on a driveway has got to be the most evil act ever.

What’s the deal?

If you get a dog, you’ve signed on to look after and love that animal…FOR LIFE. That entails picking up after the animal, keeping it leashed (if that’s the law) and training your pet so it doesn’t terrorize humans.

Unfortunately, the same idiots who are having children and then letting them run rampant are the same geniuses who are buying dogs and then neglecting them after the novelty wears off. My newest cause is a waiting period for pet buyers – just like they have for gun purchasers.

Yes, we have an overpopulation problem in the kennels and pounds, but that doesn’t mean we should be letting people with the IQ of a walnut acquire a living, feeling being that needs to be trained.

One of the discussions around the house has involved the moving of the automatic light sensor so it goes off whenever anything comes into the boundaries of the property. We’ve also discussed putting up signs.

Lastly, we talked about taking shifts sitting on the porch with the pellet gun.

To be clear, our driveway isn’t paved and is often unused as we like to park on the street. But with the recent snowstorms we’ve moved into the parking pad. So, what makes a person walking their dog decide that it’s a good idea to let their mutt crap in the same location as two automobiles?

Today it’s rainy and 50 degrees, so the feces is starting to deteriorate and would adhere nicely to the bottom of my sneakers if I’m not careful. How about letting Fido crap near the telephone pole where nobody walks? Or better yet, bring a bag with you and pick it up!

I’m not sure what to do short of putting electrified fencing around the property line. Maybe I’ll set up some motion cameras so I can track the animals that are crapping on the driveway and lawn and then email the photos to the newspaper. Now that’s pretty good – I’m already leaning that way.

That way, it’ll serve two purposes. It will alert the dog owners that we’re not pleased having their animal’s excrement on our driveway. And it will figuratively rub their noses in their dog’s crap – while the rest of the town gets to watch.

What do you suggest we do?

More to come…