Mmmm, Breakfast Buffailing

June 15, 2007

In a few minutes I’m headed out to breakfast with my parents. It’s my favorite meal of the day because of a few reasons.

1 – There’s so much DAY left after you’re done eating. Unlike dinner, you still have time after breakfast to accomplish tasks.

2 – I like eggs. A lot. I used to drink them raw like Rocky did in the first movie. Probably wasn’t too healthy, but that was also back in the days when we didn’t have hand sanitizer in every purse and bathroom. It was also before we had heard of SARS or Mad Cow or any number of other ‘bad’ conditions. Oh, yes, I almost forgot, it was also before ADD.

3 – It’s the most popular time for people to keep their weight up.

Bearing this third comment in mind,  I wonder what makes breakfast one of the most popular times to overeat? Is it because we fool ourselves into thinking that we need EXTRA fuel for the day?

That’s like filling the back of a pick-up truck with gas just because you might get stuck in traffic for 51 hours.

Or like bringing all your belongings with you to the store in case you need something to keep you entertained. Did I mention that I think ADD is a fake condition trumped up by doctors so they’ll have something to tell inattentive and uninvolved parents when they complain about Ashley’s or Kyle’s misbehavior – as they heard from the nanny?

The only thing causing ADD is the proliferation of different thoughts sparked by multiple media every moment. And possibly the preponderance of pretty alliteration in our everyday communication pieces.

So, the lesson today is simple. Don’t overeat during breakfast, say ‘pshaw’ when someone mentions ADD, and don’t name your children Ashley or Kyle.

More to come…